DEAD & GONE

Its weird cause i feel like NOBODY in this God forsaken world cares about anyone else...I understand that one has to look out for themselves before others but I didn't know that for someone to be this way they have to be so selfish...Its incredible, and I say this because I have to live through all this Bullshit (Excuse my french)and it gets sickening cause here in RI everything is about who you know, what you've done, and what click you belong to, and if you don't belong to any of these groups your a social outcast for the rest of your time in this Little Big city of Providence Rhode Island. You have people that believe that they are the greatest thing on this earth and if someone else isn't of that caliber then instantly they are removed from that one group and if your not part of that one group then to society you are considered a NOBODY...How would you feel if you were part of that group? But I don't mean to sound like a narcissist but this is supposed to be about me.... Ive been through to much shit to let all of these kids get to me... And I call them kids because thats what they act like... Kids have fun enjoy life and live for every moment that they have in their sweet little life's...I don't...I contemplate to much on the future, like "What's gonna happen after high school? What the hell happened back there? Why did this Relationship fail? What can I do to be accepted? Do people like me or don't they?" these are just a few of the many questions i ask myself every moment every minute every hour of every day... And I know that all of this thinking would drive any person crazy but Im used to it and its me... Now I know that I shouldn't be like this but with all the people in this world who are world renowned for this kinda stuff... They've all made it they did what they told themselves they were gonna do... And they did it with careful planning... But its hasn't been all bad, Ive made many new friends but ive also lost a bunch of good ones ive made friends that I know would have my back any day of the week no matter what problem I may have but at the same time ive lost friends that I thought had my back for any day of the week no matter what problem I may have, but its life I cant let a certain number of people bring me down... And in my Love life its all the same, its just things that i build up inside my own mind thinking that my significant other would be doing the same but yet their just plotting on a way to shut down all of those dreams... As I said before its like giving your heart and soul to someone and on top of that giving 110% to in return get Nothing...I may get mad and I might tell you to "SHUT THE FUCK UP !!" but theirs always something inside of me telling me "Yo Rick Wtf Is Wrong With You !!"I don't mean it... And Never Have I had the Intention to hurt a single human being, so why should I get Hurt?

I heard once that a well prepared flame burns brighter and stronger than one that you just throw a bunch of sticks and light them... But Im done with all of this Hypocritical bullshit its sickening...I think it would all be better if Little Ol Rick just shut the fuck up and did his own thing... Cause truly I believe that people would think that this world would be much better without me... So technically this letter is to say goodbye... THE OLD ME IS DEAD AND GONE AWAY